


Homer

by sandyk



Category: Golden Girls
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-23
Updated: 2013-12-23
Packaged: 2018-01-05 18:32:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1097265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sandyk/pseuds/sandyk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Breakfast conversation.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Homer

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Makioka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Makioka/gifts).



> not for profit, not mine. thanks to [redacted] for much help.

Dorothy said, "I wonder if, no, I know there are undiscovered novels and works of literature by women I would get to read if I was there at the time. Can you imagine getting to talk to Jane Austen about her books as if she was just a friend down the block?"

"Being wooed by William Shakespeare or Homer," Blanche said. 

"Homer of the Odyssey?"

"No, Homer Wiltbuck down at the Shell station," Blanche said. "Who are you, Rose?"

"I was just surprised he was on your list," Dorothy said. 

"George loved it," Blanche said with a smile. "Maybe it wouldn't be as good in person as it was when George would read it to me."

Dorothy smiled. "I like right now. I suspect being a tall woman with opinions would not go over well in most times of the past. Though I bet I could meet a better man than Stan."

"You could meet a better man than Stan in any time or age," Blanche said. "I bet back in Rome or Greece, you'd look okay in a toga and you could meet a nice man like that Brutus."

"Brutus? Blanche, he stabbed his best friend."

"When I saw that play performed, that actor was the most handsome man you ever have seen. They wouldn't cast handsome men to play him if he weren't that handsome in real life."

"How do you think they know?" Dorothy waved her hand. "Stop, I don't want to know. Drink more coffee before you tell me a St. Olaf story to explain that."

"There is no need to insult me," Blanche said. "Anyway, I agree with you. I like right now. It's a good time for women. Men appreciate the wisdom of a slightly older woman and we can let our beauty bloom in the most fashionable way, plus there are padded bras and plastic surgery. Also, with improved health care and medicine, men are in better shape than ever. I would even say more flexible."

"I'm sure you've done a very thorough study," Dorothy said. 

"And we will both live longer," Blanche said. "And our loved ones."

"I will never be rid of Ma, that's what you're saying." Dorothy smiled. "That's a good thing, right?"

Blanche chuckled. Sophia came in and said, "What's so funny?"

"We were talking about going back in time and if we'd even survive or want to," Dorothy said. 

"I sure don't want to. You know what right now has? Luther Vandross. Julio Iglesias. Burt Reynolds," Sophia said. "Men were not as attractive in the past. Know why? Bad teeth. And bad shoes. It made us all short." 

"Ma, that is not true," Dorothy. 

"Cement shoes will make you really short," Sophia said. 

"They make you dead," Blanche said. "Not short."

"You're afraid of being killed, you make sure not to walk tall. When I was young and carefree and didn't know about fear, I was as tall as Dorothy."

"Really?" Dorothy said.

"That's how I remember it," Sophia said. She sat down at the table. "Did you make me pancakes, too, or did you forget other people exist when your head hit the headboard all those times last night?"

Blanche smiled. "Victor was a very energetic man. I'm sorry if it woke you up, Sophia." 

"No, you're not. But I'll take those pancakes now."


End file.
